dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
Just walked past a girl wearing nothing but flip flops and an oversized sweatshirt crying by the front gates eating pizza. i just found your soulmate.
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
You know you're getting old when you pick up hot sorority girls at the bar, and they write down their phone number, and under it 'we're great babysitters!'
Randomize
