I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold.
we were running to make last call and you stopped me and said very seriously "if i fall, go on without me. just make sure theres a beer in my hand when you go"
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
The awkward moment your booty call shows up to the Mexican restaurant and realizes you just picked burritos over pussy
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
Randomize
