Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
My boyfriend sold my favorite shoes right off my fucking feet last night outside the bar. It might have played a part in our breakup today.
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
I just got a voicemail from some strange woman with a Russian accent. Are you ok?
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
He brought me Plan B in the snowstorm.
A+ 👏🏼
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
Randomize
