He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
Guess the answer to the last 2 texts right and you'll get a boob shot tonight. Guess wrong and it will be a picture of a used, boogery kleenex.
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
Saw my doctor at the bar. He bought me a drink. I think he was looking up my medical record on his phone because he suddenly had to go. syphilis continues to fuck with my life
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
Randomize
