im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
It's Valentine's Day, I figure for sure we'll have sex today, right? Wrong. I tried unsuccessfully for like an hour to get him to fuck me. Now he's asleep and I'm on my way to join the public library.
If you don't sing 'dust in the wind' at my funeral, I'll haunt you forever
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
Randomize
