In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
I got to the apartment, I was handed a beer within 20 seconds, I'm glowing in the dark, there's fog everywhere, and now I'm wearing a sombrero because apparently it's silly hat night. I never want to leave.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
I literally farted midsex as a siren for him to get the fuck off me.. No such luck.
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
Randomize
