If you were a Panda and I were a Koala and we had a baby, it'd be a falafel. Just think about that.
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
Randomize
