I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
She's like a cask of Amontillado. Very tempting if I was drunk, but sober, I know I'll get fucked over in the end.
Randomize
