How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
Today should be called shooting fish in a barrel day. Every place ive gone to ive met a girl who regrets not hooking up last night. There have not been girls this easy since Fathers Day
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
If I come back tomorrow to find a certain football player tied up and locked in your closet, shit's gonna get real.
I'll set him free tomorrow morning ;)
Now that we have successfully procreated, I need to know we are on the same page. Please tell me you are aware that there are whole seasons of our lives that our child can NEVER be made privy to.
We should probably write this down. That's a shit load of shit.
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
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