She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
Jumanji is 1000% better stoned while cooking breakfast.
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
I hate college football. It's really fucking with our phone sex schedule.
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
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