What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
No, seriously, 1.5 gallons of sangria plus two days of untapped cock. Waiting here. For you.
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
Late night whataburger runs are great, except if you're the one that gets left black out drunk puking in the backyard drinking from the water hose
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
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