me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
You are two creepy Justin Bieber quotes away from me not talking to you for the rest of the day
If I had a pelvic thrust emoticon, I would use it
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
That last minute feeling of hesitation on whether I should bring my health card to the bar usually means I'm in for a good night.
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
My Dachshund waddled into the room carrying a rolled-up pad in her mouth with period blood. This day is clearly off to a good start.
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
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