think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
I think misery doesn't even think of me as company anymore. I'm an unofficial roommate.
my purse only fit my wallet or the martini shaker. it wasnt even a question of which i was bringing.
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
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