I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
I just got out of a $280 speeding ticket by acting like The Big Lebowski. Seriously Jeff Bridges is the man.
Randomize
