Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
apparently i traded the tiffany necklace my mom bought me for 2 shots and next in line for beer pong at the frat.
So i banged this chick from Peru last night. Needless to say, I'm having chipotle for lunch todayas a south American reward to honor her.
Pretty sure I just slept with Elmo.
Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm.
Just when I thought he had turned a new leaf, I see a "Let me get you pregnant" shirt in his closet
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
I should start prefacing bondage with girls saying "I know you've read 50 Shades, but there is a 33% you're gonna freakout and go home, while I jerk it alone"
My nonexistent future grandchildren will one day ask me when I knew I'd lost control of my life. And now I know.
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Randomize
