with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
That's the best thing about having gay dads, you don't gotta do shit on mothers da and everybody is down wit getting wasted on mimosas at brunch
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
Just high enough for therapy.
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
I have already put on my inside pants.
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
You don't know happiness until you've got to smoke weed inside taco bell and then eat all you want for free
Randomize
