I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
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