you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
Nothing like snapchatring dick pics to a\nMarried woman while your girlfriend destroys Taco Bell in the next room. Almost caught, worth it. Got boobs back
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
After you puked in the bathtub you claimed you were never eating quesadillas again and you never even ate a quesadilla
Drake has all the answers
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
I love you. Go after that dick
I should probably just LinkedIn request everyone I've ever slept with so they stop popping up on my suggested connections list
Randomize
