It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
lets start a swedish sibling band together
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
on a related note, did you know that the fire alarm in our apartment talks?
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
do you remember when we thought we were both knocked up by the same guy like two days apart and would have half twins? Thats a best friend moment.
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
you're usually drunk when you offer. there's one time you called me, told me not to dye my hair red, and asked if i wanted to see your tits.
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
Randomize
