im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
its 4am and she invited me over to split a 'romantic bowl of frosted flakes'...really dude?...what do you think she's trying to say?...she better not be kidding about the frosted flakes though.
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
I thought you were single?
I am. But thats cuz no one wants to marry shame and regret doused in tequila. But thanks for reminding me ya dick.
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
I'm literally taking a shit naked holding a bottle of wine.
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
Randomize
