Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
It was good sex. She was screaming so much I didn't know whether or not my name was Matt or God.
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
I'm FaceTiming Pizza Hut.
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
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