she's doing push ups on the keg. hows a girl supposed to compete with that?
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
i wish i could just hire someone to go down on me every night until i fall asleep
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
This is a mass text: my birthday is tomorrow, and I want a full day of birthday sex. Send me your availabities. Time slots begin at noon
OH GOD NOT SANTA BABY. NO NO NO. YOU'RE LIKE 85. OMG MULTIPLE WOMEN. NO NO NO STAHP.
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
He said he actually "met" me for the first time through a picture his housemate had of me, drunk and passed out in a pool of my own vomit, on the floor of his basement.
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
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