like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
One a scale of one to hella drunk, how gracefully can I make it down those stairs
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