what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
got hammered last night, woke up this morning to 38 texts that varied from "you fucking asshole" to "i can be there in 10 minutes"
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
I'm not kidding, he literally jumped in the red panda exhibit. I knew this was gonna be a good birthday.
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
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