Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
A "Tom-vomit" is when you puke but cough as it comes up, so you close you mouth as a natural reaction and the vomit is jet-propelled out your noise.
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
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