I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
I recorded his orgasm, set it as his ringtone, and called him while they were singing happy birthday to his mom. Yeah, revenge is sweet.
I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
Waking up drunk is great, waking up drunk and hanging with your mom is even better.
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
Randomize
