My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
my roommates friend slept in my bed when i was out of town..she ran out screaming cause she saw my VCR
Almost accidentally stole a baby... explain later
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
Police were closing down the bar due to gunfight and I was crying because they wouldn't let me finish putting temporary shamrock tats on my boobs
The to do list extremely baked self wrote for me last night says "1. Join gym 2. Passport? 3. Join a gym" And then just a drawing of a squid
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
WELP I KNOW THE HAPPY HOUR DRINKS WERE GOOD BECAUSE MOM JUST INFORMED ME I AM THE RESULT OF POKED HOLE IN THE DIAPHRAGM
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
there is glitter all over my balls
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
Judging from the sharpie on my face, glitter on my chest and women's tiger print panties i'm wearing last night was a thing.
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