I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
Randomize
