How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
I owe all of my success to double stuf oreos and weed.
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
Just sent my mother the text "we need to get our vaginas looked at this thursday". Hows your day going?
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
Just woke up with the taste of tequila, weed, and cigarettes in my mouth spooning a friend I haven't seen since college wearing one contact and one ankle sock. I hate myself.
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
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