get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
You're married and I'm going to make out with a stranger tonight. Isn't that weird? It's like a gap in the time space continium.
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
Randomize
