Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
They found a chair, duct taped me to it, then gave me a bottle of vodka to 'make me feel at home'
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
Worst walk of shame everrr. Hopefully the thought of me walking 20 minutes in the freezing cold with someone else's sweatpants, a bra on & high heels will cheer you up today.
Oh god there are people jogging. Fuck off productive people, you don't know me.
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
i don't remember much about your party last weekend but i remember you being so drunk you were crying in your driveway about pickles at four am
Because sadly the idea of me having a girlfriend is crazy enough to be an April fools prank
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
Randomize
