We can't ever have kids because there's a chance that they'll end up just like us.
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
Jelly. This is your "are you still alive" text. Any response will do.
Hey I found a cat!
Is it weird that my ex and the dude I'm talking to now both only have one testicle? Apparently I've found my type..
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
Randomize
