Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
only if we run a train.
done.
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
The best part was her genuine shock and total "I didn't know" look when we said she couldn't cook a steak in a microwave.
The only good thing about trampolines when you're fucked up is the gushing blood really cleans all the bad coke out of your nose.
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
Complete and utter failure. 100% unsalvageable. I have not failed so hard at a culinary endeavor in YEARS. MY HONOR IS IMPUGNED I HAVE SHAMED MY HOUSE
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