My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
I'm here to help build your repertoire of drunken shenanigans and I should have been arrested stories
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
Randomize
