just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
I'm going to make "gut the love salmon" a common slang term for sex. Spread the word.
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
Randomize
