There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
She went from zero to smokin in five shots
We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
I replaced his Viagra pills with sleeping pills.
8 stitches. Next time I decide to twerk while doing a keg stand, stop me.
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
Randomize
