im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
the guy I was hooking up with asked me if he could wear a guerilla suit during sex.
those girls across the street saw me hanging my towel off of my penis...they're coming over later
my drunken desire to be gossip girl continues to ruin friendships for me
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
