I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
I just spent the last 30 mins playing uplifting songs to my uterus, & there's no way I'm pregnant.
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
Drunk me obviously wants to fuck up my life
It's like I have an arch nemesis, and it's me
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
Just had a threesome for the second time in my life. I don;t even enjoy threesomes. Too much effort.
HOW DO THESE THINGS KEEP HAPPENING TO YOU?
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
Randomize
