...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
I just texted him and asked him to keep some in case I need help sealing the deal.
Girl Scout cookies are like roofies for fat chicks.
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
Randomize
