Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
To the person who left a cup of vomit in the bathroom: I commend you for your aim but you are dead to me- not an ideal birthday present.
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
My girl friends dad just asked how I get so drunk and then he passed out with a bloody Mary in his hand on the couch it's 230 do you know where your parents are
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Randomize
