Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
And then my night got REAL pukey
If you bring home Chipotle tonight I'll give you an epic bj...ball play and all #datenight
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
Randomize