she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, you're a dumbass
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
I just found (and ate) a chunk of a reese's that fell between my boobs. Problem is that I finished those off 3 days ago in a drunk induced sob session... Has it really been that long since I changed my clothes?!
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
Randomize
