You had a beer at 10:30 this morning?
Ya, I didn't have any Tylenol.
If I don't wake up snuggled up to 14 ice cream sandwiches, my life is incomplete.
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
Did I just pee in the Taco Bell parking lot?
Yep. But do you remember wiping with my quesadilla?
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
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