pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
Can we be in one of those super weird relationships where you carry me around everywhere?
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
Randomize
