Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
Princesses don't give blow jobs
I guess I fist pumped too hard. I hit my mom in the face and now we're sitting in the ER.
When we told the nurse what happened, she replied with "OH, Well you don't look Italian to me!"
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
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