just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
So how'd the job interview go?
well turns out the guy interviewing me was a regular at the strip club where i used to work. Talk about awkward
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
It's all part of my master plan: have him buy me all I can eat pizza and all I can drink beer AND THEN tell him there was no spark and we're better off as friends.
All because of that GODDAMNED MIKE PENCE.
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
Randomize
