It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
I'm so tired of dating women who lie about their age. You show up feeling like you need to follow them around with a dust pan and a broom.
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
Out of ice. Vodka+club soda+cut up lime popscicle=I'm an alcoholic genius.
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
Randomize
