So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
He's the equivalent of a body pillow and a dildo. But still funny. We have good pillow talk.
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
She's just so happy...and so naked.
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
Randomize
