i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
I want to apologize in advance for texting you a picture of my penis tonight.
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
I am available for nakedness
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
Ya i'm marrying the man who can hear/smell this level of flatulence and stick around
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
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