I want to stick my p in your. b.
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
He asked the waiter, at 6:40 am, drunk, if they served alcohol. After he said no, he's like 'well, I guess we can eat then.'
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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